My Writing

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Bats In My Bathroom, Part 2 (Viewer Discretion Advised)

The photo you are about to see is not pleasant. 

It could make you feel ill. 

Or give you nightmares.

It might send chills up your spine,

or it could put you in a coma. 

It almost puts me in a coma every time I look at it. 

That is why, for a week, I have debated whether or not I should post it.


Perhaps, after you view it you will wish you hadn't, and if you even remotely have a tender tummy, or if you have just eaten a big meal I advise you to stop reading now and look at photos on some one else's blog....
photos of cute babies 
and dogs 
and cupcakes, 
for example.  

What is the photo of, you ask? 

Remember how I told you all that we have bats living in our bathroom? 

Well, we went on a trip for two weeks. 

We shut the door in the bathroom, and tried not to think about it while we were gone.  Perhaps they would be gone when we came home....perhaps they weren't bats after all, but just cute bluebirds. Perhaps the whole thing was just a nightmare. 

But when we came home and peered cautiously into the little room, there was no way we could deny what all of our senses told us; the smell...the sight....and the sounds. 

The bats are still there. 

And from the looks of the size of their droppings, they are large. 

Definitely larger than mice. 

Maybe even small cats. 

Are you sure you want to see it? 

I am warning you. 






This is your last chance. 






Maybe if you just looked at it with one eye.





Or shut both of your eyes and looked at it through your eyelashes. 







Here it comes:






I told you it was awful. 

Looking on the bright side, it does look like they got most of it in the toilet.

Let me remind you that we can't actually see the bats. They are above the light. But now the light is almost completely filled with droppings and it is overflowing out the sides of the vents and falling down over our toilet. 

I called the Bat Man the next day. He said he couldn't do anything about it since the bats in the area still were not grown up yet and if he did anything now they might get into our house and then everyone in my family would have to get rabies shots. 

So he told me to wait another week and they would reassess the bat populations and then call us back. 

A WEEK?!!




So we keep the door closed. 
And locked. (Just in case they are smart bats.)

But I can hear them. 
They squeak and chirp while I am doing my hair and painting my toenails. 


 Fortunately we don't hear them at night because, of course, that is when they are out....

...sucking blood.


We will have to replace our fan and light. And probably the 15-foot pipe that goes through our house to the outside vent. And how are we going to do that? Pry up the ceiling I guess. 

In the meantime I go in there every few days (yes, I am BRAVE), sweep up the bat droppings, flush and sanitize the toilet so that it will be useable again in the future. By humans. 


Now you can go back to the other blogs. 
Blogs about babies, 
and dogs,
and cupcakes. 







7 comments:

  1. You did it. And it's horrific, but at least they're sort of trying to get it in the toilet? Right? sort of trying?

    ReplyDelete
  2. YIKES! I am still baffled by the fact that you have to wait another week! Why not just kill the suckers? And I don't know that I could ever use that bathroom without looking up and wondering...

    ReplyDelete
  3. It is bat guano, you get that fertilizer out in your garden!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I didn't think about that, Sherry! What a super idea! I think I might try that! And still I have not found any bugs in my garden (that is directly outside the opening to where the bats live) so there are some beneficial side-effects to having bats in your home. I think once the Bat Man gets everything sealed up I will put a bat box on one of the trees. That way they can still help protect my garden. We shall become allies. :)

      Delete
  4. AAAAGGGHHH! You gave me so many warnings and I STILL wasn't prepared for that. Ew ew ew ew.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I think I would get a new bat guy. When they are gone at night why can't you block them out then? I would never be that patient. Glad it's you and not me. YUCK~~~

    ReplyDelete